Friday, September 18, 2009

None But Jesus

This post is specially for those who don't feel happy being in church anymore. I see you, & I feel you. You're not alone in this. There are people saying healing & joy has come, but you're not feeling it; you're not believing it. I'm with you. I hope this post will encourage you & bless you.

It took us a while to decide if we're going to church camp or not. It wasn't a small decision for us - my wife & I had nights where we would just be crying on our bed as we talked about it. The past year had been a wild journey for us. The only reason we survived through it was because we hung on to the knowledge that in all of the storm, God is with us. And indeed He was.

You see, I used to be associated as the pastors' son. I hated every generalization that came with it, but at the same time I was proud to be the pastors' son. When my mom preached about Sons vs Servants, I immediately (wrongly) took on the identity as a son in the house - I became the son of the church. And when my father resigned from the church, I thought I had nothing left but to be a rebel.

But God has pulled me out of that now. He's taken me on a journey, teaching me about our adoption as children of God. I'm not a son of the church. I am a child of God. You see (again), if we base our identity in anything other than our position in God, we will crumble. If our source of life, joy, strength & hope is anything other than Jesus Himself, we will run dry.

If you let me, I could think of so many reasons to walk out of the church & just plant myself somewhere else. No church is perfect, but at least it'll be a new start - I'll be appreciated, I might get paid for my service, and it'll be years before anyone realizes what an idiot I am!! So why are we still in FCC, serving in the youth ministry & music team? Well, there's only 1 reason really - God hasn't said anything yet. And until He does, I must be faithful with the gifts & the responsibilities entrusted to me. As long as I'm still here, I will love the local church & the people in it. It's not because there's a new pastor or a new church board, or that the youth ministry is growing - it's simply listening & obeying to voice of the One whom I belong to.

I guess what I'm trying to say is this - FIX YOUR EYES ON JESUS. Do not depend on anyone or anything else. Desire to know His love for you & respond accordingly, & everything else will be an overflow out of that relationship.

4 comments:

Wing Lah said...

Chi Wing likes this. *Thumbs up*

nothing of interest here said...

with you joash. i'm with you. *hugs*

ksm said...

mm hm! :) i loike it too! x

Justin Kang said...

I just saw this on your Facebook. And I totally agree. Now learning to not care so much of church. Can't ba a 'churchy' person. I know that because it is a fact that you will be eventually let down by the church. So now, I want to serve Jesus, not the church. Him first before the church. But, it's hard and all. Being hurt, and much more. Peace of God. =)